Release

***For my non-LDS friends- in our Church, there are no paid positions such as preacher, minister, secretary, etc.  Even the custodial work is done on a volunteer basis.  We refer to these positions as "callings", as in- you are called of God to fulfill certain responsibilities.  Being "released" from a calling simply means you don't have that responsibility any more and someone else does.  A ward is a congregation.  And CTR stands for Choose The Right .***

Well, I'm officially out of a job at Church.  I've been teaching the CTR 4 class for about 18 months now.  The children are all 4 years old on Jan. 1 and turn 5 during the year.  I had my twins in my class last year.  That was a challenge.  This year, I got all the kids with birthdays in August-December.  It has been an even bigger challenge.  3 of the boys are very *very* active.  One of the girls is also.  I had 8 children in my class altogether this year.  10 last year.  There were days that I wanted to tear my hair out and run from the classroom screaming.  And then there were days that I just loved being where I was.
Today I was released from that calling.  I'm not sure how I feel about it.  I also don't have a visiting teaching route right now.  So I really don't have any responsibilities at Church.  It's an odd place to be.  The only time I've experienced this is when we've moved into a new ward and they just haven't gotten to us yet.  I don't know if the Bishopric has something else in mind for me or if they just wanted to take some of the "burden" off me with Brian being gone.  When Brother Bryner told me last week that they were going to release me, I was surprised.  I told him that I was fine continuing but if they felt I needed to be released then that was okay.  So I've thought about it all week and I'm still not sure how I feel about it.  I'm grateful to not be so stressed out every week trying to teach the children the lessons while they bounce off the walls (once one of them gets going, they all get going!!!). At the same time, do I really have a purpose in even going to Church now?  Other than Sacrament Meeting, I mean.  I'm not going to stop going!!!!  There would be a HUGE void in my life without the Church.  But I've been so busy on Sundays with teaching this class, how am I going to feel just sitting in Sunday School and Relief Society listening to the lesson?
I'm sure there is something else in store for me.  I'm going to just enjoy the calm before the storm!!!